Oct. 15, 2002 - they've been quiet. I know they're up to something. Bi-atches.
April 17, 2002 - Not much activity on the squirrel front here, because they've been busy chewing into Jeff's attic instead.
March 7, 2002 - Todd manfully repelled the squirrel house-eating attack by calling the rental office and getting them to come fix it. So, I am still alive. Jack sent me this quote from The Scarlet Letter: "A squirrel, from the lofty depthes of his domestic tree, chattered either in anger or merriment---for a squirrel is such a choleric and hurmorous little personage, that it is hard to distinguish between his moods---so he chattered at the child, and flung down a nut upon her head. It was a last year's nut, and already gnawed by his sharp tooth."
February 12, 2002 - The horror. The horror. For over a week now, the squirrels have been waking Todd and me up every night around three or four in the morning with the strange noises they make in the ivy outside our bedroom window. Every night! Now, bits of insulation have appeared in the ivy. I think they're trying to eat their way into our house. We're doomed, people.
Dec. 14, 2001 - Squirrel staring in my home office window prompts a message to Todd which bears repeating to all of you who consider yourselves my friends - if one day I go missing and my gnawed, mutilated body turns up weeks later up a tree somewhere, you know who to blame.
Dec. 5, 2001 - Three flames in less than five minutes from the same individual - possibly a world record. Although the putative flamer is a member of the mailing list I moderate, the rabidity, rapidity, and sheer lack of brains betrayed by the messages convince me that the squirrels are somehow behind it.
Dec. 1, 2001 - Carol sent me this link. Insidious.
Nov. 11, 2001 - A squirrel was watching Todd through the window as he cooked breakfast.
Oct. 26, 2001 - Drowned squirrel found in an empty garbage can behind my house. Suicide? - or ambush gone awry?
Oct. 20, 2001 - The squirrels stoop to new lows, terrorizing my family. Todd reports that while I was at work today, the squirrels sat outside of the windows and taunted the cats.
Sept. 11, 2001 - No less than three squirrels entered Autumn Leaves today while I was at work. Two yielded to 'herding' maneuvers, but the last holed up in a broom closet and had to be removed by a wildlife specialist. No evidence has come to light on whether the squirrels coordinated their efforts with any of the day's other events.
Sept. 2, 2001 - A squirrel entered the foyer area of my place of employment, Autumn Leaves Used Books, and scrabbled determinedly at the door. I was forced to go round and enter through the back.